I AM

There's been a lot of a whole lot lately. Increasing mountains of challenges and unexpected glimpses of God's awesomeness. I have been greatly encouraged by God's provision for the precious ones at Lifesong School in Zambia and the lavishness of His provisions. Lavish. The word lavish just makes me smile as I say it. My friend Karol is teaching on the lavishness of God's love through I John, these past few days when I think of how He's provided...lavishly.

WOW! Lavishness of God's love and grace was about to turn into just awesomeness and perhaps somewhat ridiculous of His gifting and my unworthiness.

Backing up a few days...On Thursday we got some really difficult news that was very confusing. I hit my knees crying out to God. For days I have been crying out to God to speak to me clearly through this situation. Truth and His way.  Brian and I had a conversation Sunday about I AM.  The jist of it was either He is who He said He Is...way, truth and life or He's not. We are both believers so we believed that He Is...not imagining that God would "speak" to us on His own behalf aside from His Word (nor does He have to) I AM.

Yesterday, I drove my 3 older kiddos to class, they are in class MWF and homeschool T & Th. After I dropped them of at school. Away from the school and alone in the van for a few moments, I cried out to God and begged Him for mercy. I asked if there was sin in my life that I had not confessed or repented of fully that the consequence be mine. I begged for mercy again and worshiped to the music (not fully sure if  Jesus Messiah was truly Immanuel God with me but fully sure that He was God of this City) as I drove on to get some groceries before heading home.

A few hours later after I drove to pick up the kiddos from school, I checked our mail. There were the usual things inside and a package. it was kind of heavy and felt like a book. I opened the package and pulled out a book  I AM changes who i am by Gregg Matte. An unexpected gift for a voracious reader like me.


I AM changes who i am

Again, the question is answered, as if there was truly a question. I AM.

In many ways, I AM had spoken for Himself.

I AM.

Forgive my small faith and continue to speak and reveal more of yourself. You did not hold back, help me not to hold back from you. Your will be done. Your Way, Your Truth, You are Life.

I AM.

For a second time when we are facing difficulty that we do not understand, we are encouraged and blessed by As Our Own and First Baptist Church of Houston.  and the awesomeness and the lavishness of

I AM