Not Done Yet.

Not done yet.

Moving forward for me over the years has meant a lot of looking backwards first. It is a requirement to look back and discuss during each  home study process.  As a Christian it is also important to look back and honestly examine myself before God and before moving ahead, to ask Him to re-examine me.

David wrote about it in Psalm 139

O LORD, you have searched me and you know me.
² You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.
³ You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.
⁴ Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD.
 ⁵ You hem me in—behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me.
⁶ Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.

²³ Search me, O God, and know my heart;test me and know my anxious thoughts.
²⁴ See if there is any offensive way in me,and lead me in the way everlasting. 

 As I look back, I find it impossible to understand why God would know me so intimately, all of me and yet, seek to adopt me as His child. He is far more knowledgeable than a specialist reviewing a medical file or surgical team viewing a video or photograph to better determine a realistic outcome. He is creator God, Elohim, maker of me before the earth was even created and knew all of me that will ever be. Seeing me, El Roi, as I am. Knowing me and deciding in a definitive and public way I am worth it.

My Daddy God decided I am worth it and made it clear with sending His son Jesus to make a way so I could be adopted into His family.

At times I have needed to hear from God to keep moving forward. He has continued to affirm through His word. And in a very personal way that I needed to hear.

I heard Hudson laugh. A sound that I had not remembered hearing so clearly in any of the times I had watched him on the DVD in the past. I heard his laugh and saw again a precious son that needed his mother.
 This journey is for His glory.

Not done yet.